Petal By Petal

I did not know where to begin with the ‘Flower Petal Exercise’ from Richard N. Bolles’ book “What Color is Your Parachute?” The book is self-help for people who are about to embark on or searching for the next step in their professional lives. This specific exercise centers around getting a better understanding of a person’s wants and needs for their career path through the metaphor of flower petals. I truly thought the whole exercise would be easy, but I was wrong.

Sadly, I believe we as a society are more integrated to point out the negative aspects of ourselves and one another than the positives. So while I think that logic is one of the main reasons that I hit a wall, it is not the only rationale that hindered my ability to do the exercise. I believe the other reason is because I have spent the last eight years truly developing my skills as a student (I don’t really count middle school or any primary education). I have been selling myself as a student for so long that I have to make the transition to prepare to sell myself as a potential employee or graduate student. 

When I finally started the exercise, I tried to go in order of every petal.  I am a very linear thinker, so I rarely skip around when there is any numerical work that I have to analyze or answer. With this work, though, I had to jump around because there were some questions that I could not think of answers to right away. As soon as I started to skip around with the petals, I decided to order them from the easiest to answer to the hardest.

My List (From Easiest to Hardest)

  1. You and Geography
  2. You and a Workplace
  3. You and the Knowledges You Already Have
  4. You and People
  5. You and Salary/Responsibility
  6. You and Your Purpose in Life
  7. You and Skills

The first two, You and Geography along with You and a Workplace, were the easiest, and that makes sense as both prose of these petals describe the ideal setting in which I can see myself doing the most work for my career. I’ve always wanted to head up north after I graduate, so it was very simple to list the characteristics I have always admired about the New England region. For You and a Workplace, while it was simple, it was also much more fun than I was expecting. I basically go to dream up my ideal workplace, and since I want to be a writer of some sort, I basically describe a piece of my dream home. 

You and the Knowledges You Already Have was a bit harder than the previous, but not by much. The petal was hard in the sense that I am not good at categorizing things I know much about, as I do not have to think hard about the subjects at hand. It helped when I listed off my hobbies and could see that there are subjects that I know greatly about. At this point, I could already see the exercise’s main purpose already at work, as it made me focus on myself, get in tune with my mind, and know my worth. 

You and People was challenging because I tend to work best on my own, but that does not mean I am closed off to the aspect of working with a group of creative collaborators. I love to listen to interesting writing prompts and see where other writers take them, so while it was hard, I basically had to open myself up to the possibility I would be working closely with others in the workplace. You and responsibility go into the same category for me, as I do not know what my ideal salary is at the moment. All I know is that I want a job. But I had to put myself in the mindset of being responsible for others if I could see myself doing that in the future, which is still debatable. 

You and Your Purpose in Life, along with You and Your Skills, were the hardest ones to answer, in my opinion. The petal based around my purpose in life was a little easier because I know what I want my purpose to be: to be a figure of inspiration for writing, even just for one person. I want to create characters that speak to people to be able to bring more representation to the LGBTQ+ community while staying true to whichever genre I choose to write in.

To figure that out, I had to push past all my humility and ask myself what I truly wanted to get out of my life. It was a very scary question, but I found myself more at peace after answering it. You and Your Skills was the hardest for me because, like I said in the introduction, I am not very good at pushing past the negatives, but for this I did. I found myself to be an analyzer, an empathetic person, and a great listener. While those skills seem miniscule, I have learned from this class and the Flower Petal Exercise that they are anything but. 

The Flower: “That One Piece of Paper”

June 18, 2023, 3:41 pm in Somis, CA

In Richard N. Bolles’s book, What Color is Your Parachute? he creates a guidebook to better understand oneself, your preferences when it comes to your career, and what you have to offer in the workforce. Overall, this book is extremely helpful for those who don’t know what they wish to do in their professional lives, those who want to hone in on their ideal career paths, and those who are looking for different avenues they might be interested in taking. This book presents various steps and exercises designed to guide you toward valuable insights about yourself and your aspirations, helping you contemplate the life you envision.

One of these exercises is called “The Flower Exercise: A Comprehensive Self-Inventory” (111).

This “Flower Exercise” is meant to get you to better understand yourself, your preferences, and your purpose regarding the work environment. By following each petal, you learn more about what you wish to gain from your career experience and what you believe you can offer.

At the beginning of completing this task myself, I was completely overwhelmed by the idea of the flower, but as I began with the first petal, the details I learned about myself proved worth the effort and contemplation.

When I began to write out the types of people I have worked with in the past, I found a pretty even split between working with coworkers who made my work life enjoyable and those who made it less so. I found myself writing things like “I don’t want to work with someone who is emotionally manipulative” and laughing at myself for even staying in a job like that, even for a short time. It made me realize that when it comes to coworker preferences, maybe my bar was a little too low. At the very least, I don’t want to work with someone who is actively mean to me, but that should be obvious…shouldn’t it?

In recollection of this, I began to think about what I wanted from my work relationships and what types of people I cared about being around. Although it wasn’t necessarily at the very top of my list, I found myself really wanting to be around people who inspire me. I want to work with people who have a strong, passionate curiosity about the world, much like myself. I want to work with someone who is interesting to talk to and teaches me new things all the time. I was surprised by my gravitation toward dynamic agency and shared intellect. In this, I found that wishing for my coworkers to be kind is a given to me, and beyond that, I want more.

June 18, 2023, 3:34 pm in Somis, CA

The second petal deals with your preferred working conditions. This petal was one of the least daunting of the group, mainly because I have always known I do not want to work in a cubicle. I have never seen myself in an office building or at a desk on the eleventh floor with little to no natural light.

To no surprise at all, I want to work somewhere that has natural light that feels open and inviting. A place that has dynamic energy instead of stagnation.

I then moved on to the next petal, “transferable skills.” Completing this petal and doing the exercises within it took me a while. Not because I didn’t feel like I had important skills to offer but because I had difficulty figuring out which ones I felt were the most important. Even now, I feel like there are some listed on there that might not be in the right order, or perhaps I feel like my order of preference will change. More so, I found that doing these exercises helped me better understand what skills of mine I find are really important. It made me wonder what other people would say about me. What would my skills be if I asked my closest friends, family, and professors what they felt stood out to them? It made me wonder what would change, what would remain on the list, and what might be added that I did not know about myself.

The fourth petal, “knowledges,” seemed to surprise me more than I anticipated. Having a family so deeply woven into the entertainment industry, I have found myself steering away from that avenue to give myself a sense of independence. And yet, this exercise made me realize how much I care about media. As someone who is extremely opinionated, I found myself writing about movies and television shows that I either loved or hated, and I find myself increasingly passionate about discussing them. If I were on a desert island, I would 100% talk about my favorite films and TV shows for days on end. For the most part, I think I just write it off as stupid leisure activities, but this exercise made me realize how deeply I care about the media I intake and that I am extremely opinionated and passionate about them. News to me (clearly, I am blind).

Oof. Petal five is all about money. This is where I felt that I learned the most. Growing up, my family never really talked about money, and to this day, they have been pretty hands-off in teaching me anything that has to do with the matter. I would say that my relationship with money is confusing, and I don’t understand many aspects of it at all. Learning about it and how to properly take care of myself as an individual has been something I am slowly learning on my own. And I am everything but good at it. But working through this petal and the exercises that went along with it, I feel closer to understanding that relationship and how I want it to look in the future.

June 18, 2023, 3:30 pm in Somis, CA

When it came to petal six, “places to live,” I found myself more attached to aspects of places versus actual places. Yes, I dream of living in Edinburgh, Syndey, and Osaka at some point in my life, but wherever I am called to, I will go. What I mean by this is that I want to follow opportunities, and I want to follow whatever in my life brings me joy. When it comes to physical places, I want to be somewhere that has lots of activities, great food, places to adventure to, interesting people, seasonal weather, and a place that celebrates holidays.

In making this list, I found what really matters to me is, in fact, the little things. I care about having fun things to do, trying new foods, meeting different people, and being in a place that loves Halloween as much as I do. Wherever I can find the little things that bring me joy is where I want to go.

Finally, on to the seventh petal, “purpose.” Although the idea of this petal is extremely overwhelming and, clearly, a very large and daunting question, I found this petal to be the easiest of them all. If there is anything I know about myself, it is my purpose. I might not know every aspect of my purpose in life, but I, at the very least, deeply believe that I know some.

As written in my flower: My goal, purpose, or mission in life is to…

“increase love, compassion, and beauty (in the form and legacy of art) in the world by deeply affecting individuals and evoking emotion and contemplation through my presence, words, and art. I wish to help individuals learn how to love themselves, each other, and the world around us.”

And I hope that one day, I will do just that.

July 16, 2023, 12:55 pm in Somis, CA