Times are changing as newer generations slowly but surely dominate popular culture, trends, and slang. Along with new vocabulary, there has been an increase in popularity regarding pronoun usage and pronouns that deviate from the “standard” she/her or he/his and that is the use of they/them in a singular form. It’s more often used as a gender-neutral alternative since English doesn’t have an existing term for individuals who may not identify as male or female and don’t want to use the pronouns typically associated with those respectively.
While seemingly simple at first glance there is a major disconnect between generations on the use of they/them as it’s often still thought of as a word dedicated to talking about more than one person or in a plural form. However, it’s something we’ve always done either consciously or subconsciously as Kirby Conrod, a linguist at the University of Washington, provides an example for TIME magazine, “Did you see that? He or she cut me off!” in the context of driving. The point is that it’s inaccurate to say that we have always used specifically gendered pronouns when referring to individuals, especially strangers in the heat of the moment, and that it’s simply more convenient to use “they”.
There has been opposition regarding using they/them as a singular pronoun, especially as Merriam-Webster dictionary has updated the definition to include, “used with a singular antecedent to refer to an unknown or unspecified person” and “used to refer to a single person whose gender is intentionally not revealed.” This was met with various reactions from the public ranging from acceptance and happiness because of the recognition but also distaste and indignation as Jacqui Banaszynski says, “This a slippery slope to ‘anything goes.” and how even she has found herself struggling with the clarity of “they/them” in both speech and more so in texts. However, she also acknowledges that it is possible and she goes on to praise a story in the New York Times Magazine that provided context and clarity with the use of pronouns. In this case, I think it not only depends on the skill of the author but also how up-to-date the individual reading is and the confusion can be addressed by providing context and other aids, especially if the audience is as diverse as the New York Times readers.
I believe the controversy in this conversation lies in the fact the topic of pronouns, gender, and sexuality has become politically charged whereas if we left it as simply a matter of language and preference. Language holds a lot of power and many individuals already identify with they/them pronouns so I think an alternative is unlikely. Furthermore, if “they/them” has the issues it does now regarding the confusion and lack of widespread use, I don’t think an alternative will fix this but instead make it worse.
Banaszynski, Jacqui, and Jacqui Banaszynski. “What to Do When Pronouns Can Confuse.” Nieman Storyboard, 29 June 2023, niemanstoryboard.org/stories/language- precision-pronouns-inclusivity/.
Steinmetz, Katy. “Why Singular ‘they’ Is a Controversial Subject.” Time, Time, 13 Dec. 2019, time.com/5748649/word-of-year-they-merriam-webster/.